How much longer do our arms need to be in order to extend out to the reaches of where we are trying to get to?

What?

In other words, Brookstone is strangling my email account.

A few weeks back – while at the Stamford "Town Center" I purchased a little gifty gift for my husband's birthday. It was something that I never imagined could exist — but he asked for it and I found it at Brookstone. Thinking that this was the greatest store on earth—saving me from having to build the in-shower fog-less lighted shave mirror, I was very grateful… The clerk had a heck of a time ringing me up though— apparently he needed proof of my first born, blood type and a DNA sample but when he asked for my email I hesitated. Why? I don't need emails from Brookstone… I hate html emails and I hate sale notices– among the thousands of emails in my inbox — this would only add to the clog.  I refused — but he was a persistent little bugger and insisted that he could not complete the sale without my email address. Now… how is this possible.. I started to rant and wave my hands wildly — EMAIL-ISM! What if I don't have an email address — would you not let me buy this amazing thing? I don't even own a computer — Are you telling me that every person on this planet that tries to buy something from Brookstone MUST have an email address???  I was beginning to scare my son so I took a breath…. My email address is… rms@…

I understand the need for my email address.  As a member of the marketing world — one would assume that I would hop
right in and wade in the flux of list building tools. Instead, I
hypocritically recommend these tactics while loathing them at the same
time. I do think, however, that REQUIRING one's personal information in order to allow the purchase of a in-shower fog-less lighted shave mirror is taking the world order a little-teeny-tiny-bit too far.

To date, I have received 3 to 4 emails a day from Brookstone since my purchase. I have tried to "unsubscribe" but they must have watched my wall bouncing display and have decided to blacklist and proceed with torture.  Pray for me, please.