Is there anything to gain from being fake?
I mean, I get it. You are a brand. You believe in the gimmick. You really do wear tutus all the time. You didn’t dye your hair neon pink for any other reason than to be noticed… And, although we know you couldn’t help yourself, you decided to stand up and announce that you’re not a blogger… at a blogging conference. Do it. It’s fine. There is a fine line between absurd and obnoxious… but what the hell, we might be boobs, but we’re also adults — GO WITH IT. Because… although no one at BlogHer 2010 was really there to pay any attention to you… you made them do it anyway. I mean WHO do we think we are? Just a bunch of Hoo Haas hoping to glean a little knowledge from others that may or may not know what they are talking about? And, I mean, the schtick might be funny… but say it one more time, and I might just take your tagline and smother you with it. Because if blogging wasn’t the topic of choice at BlogHer 2010 — being fake was a definite runner up… a bunch of bloggers (among some great bloggers, mind you) trying to get other bloggers to read their blogs… let alone the general public (hi there public, I love you!) And, while I am considering how to handle this delicate egg of a situation, its occurring to me that one teeny tiny incident needs to be addressed.
I met some amazing people at BlogHer, there is absolutely no question about that… people that I have been connecting with for months… Like minded thinkers, life partners, accomplices… That… Okay granted, I just met on Friday… But soft! What light through yonder window breaks? — Right? And when I was all juiced up and giddy about having met these awesome people, that really turned out to be people… Another person that knows me through the internet… who happens to be internet-loved by many and someone that I’ve collaborated with recently, someone that I’ve…And boom. Crash. “I think I know you”, taking my card as I explained who I am and how she knows me, not looking me in the eye, grasping the ever distracting cell phone, backing away… Knowing exactly who I was and, although I might be a deranged lunatic with my tongue hanging out of my nose, I was snubbed. Shot Down. Ignored. WHAT JUST HAPPENED? Did the conference room just sprout lockers and a gym teacher named Rose? Because if I’m not mistaken, 10th grade just started ALL OVER AGAIN… And as she walked to the table at the front of the room with the other panel speakers, I thought… Huh, she just did that. She did that knowingly and on purpose. And immediately, she was exposed. I then sucked my tongue back into my mouth and cartwheeled out of the room.
Later on that day my friends and I huddled together discussing the situation while a woman behind us twisted her neck in the most unusual ways in an attempt to eavesdrop. Aside from the subject not knowing much about public speaking… did she know what she had just done? Maybe it was nerves, because yes. I am THAT INTIMIDATING. Perhaps not. Maybe. Yes. No. It’s possible.. But before over-analyzing, and since we were finished braiding each others hair… we moved on to more important experiments… like holding a sex toy close to me to see what would happen… because don’t all writing conferences hand out free sex toys? We then went back to snarling and growling about other topics like lactation rooms, while I beamed with pride over the honesty being displayed.
And what happens to someone that goes from being one individual on the internet to another person in real life? From being the man behind the curtain to the lady that really likes to write her website address all over her own cleavage? Do they actually believe themselves? And if so, how long do they think that we will continue to buy it? I’m holding it out there for you to answer… because while I was hoping for a group hug of Bloggers of the World Unite, I now have to wonder how genuine the typing is until I meet you face to face…
disingenuousness sucks. for example: me trying to use big fancy words like disingenuousness.
thanks for keeping it real. in person and on the interwebz. i’m girl crushin on you. hard.
why thank you! The whole thing was overwhelming! I should have taken a break before posting… haven’t even been able to read anything since I got home!
Oh no…I’m sorry. That sucks. There were a few people that I met who really seemed to not care at all…and, same as you, they were people I ‘talk’ to practically on a daily basis. Kind of eye opening.
I did a lot of unfollowing and unsubscribing when I got home. I had a great time, but won’t be able to read someone the same way if I know that are putting on such a big act or just not nice.
I was thrilled to get a chance to say hi to you and Amanda. It’s so nice to put a face to the name
and it was great to meet you too! I’m not going to unfollow anyone or stop reading… okay maybe ONE blog. Is it possible that everyone was so hyped up on nervous energy that they forgot how to… be?
I was dissed by a lady wearing a McDonald’s paper bag on her head.
It certainly was 10th grade all over again.
My new favorite phrase coined by Brilliant Sulk. ” I want to get that new baby OUT of here and put it in a bubble, A BUBBLE!” This must have been right before the lady with the bag dissed you.
I would have taken the bag headed lady..
Since I didn’t attend high school here, I learned about American high schools from watching Porky. I was fully expecting a hole inside that gym room with somebody’s penis sticking out. (At least that’s the part of Porky I remember. If it’s wrong, please don’t tell me. I love the way I remember the movie…) This weekend is more than surreal. Like The Matrix. And I’d rather be stuck on that battle ship with you ladies who keep it real eating grubs than being inside those pods dreaming away. Does that even make sense? I’m still recovering from the massive drinking… Anyway, when the Interwebz get your down, think of us, those who genuinely adore you. xxoo
Just when I thought it would be impossible to fall more deeply in love, you pull this out of your hat . Porky’s. Yes.
I’m thinking that Porky’s and the Matrix describes high school beautifully… at least someone got it right! The adoration is all on this side of the table Sweets!
Okay, after reading this, I am pretty sure of two things. I still completely hate that I missed it!!! I am VERY glad that I had the Cocktail Party pass, which would have meant only chilling with “pattypunker” outside the conference, thus avoiding the potential snubs. I don’t really deal quietly with snubs.
sorry we missed you! AND sorry that I missed out on all the parties… I was lame and had to leave early both nights… which, if anyone from my past can concur, is typically true to form.
*Erasing blog name from boobs with own spit* Can we still all do the group hug??
group hug in motion — go go gadget arms…
You can do a cartwheel?!?!?
I would have missed all the sessions to watch that.
I think I forgot to lick you. NOW who’s disingenuous?
I saw you try to lick.. I’m quick like that.
[...] Dufmanno’s encounter with a naked cowboy which was not the most skin she saw last weekend, For the Birds’ restrained song that is really not about you, and yes, Vapid, I am drumming my fingers waiting for your BlogHer report here… Pull yourself [...]
i think that was one of the things that i was most afraid of. i’m not a writer either, i just write. i hope to make it to blogher11 though… maybe then i’ll be brave enough
tolerance counts more than bravery at BlogHer… both physical and mental…. and now that I know… you don’t have to even think your a writer to attend.
What is this “BlogHer2010″ all about? Do you all stand around and talk about your blogs? I don’t get it? Am I missing something here? So many people talk about it. No, really, I’m curious. Inquiring minds want to know.
Sounds like you had a great time and met some super people though. And you walked away with some insight and ideas. That’s all that counts!
“What is this “BlogHer2010″ all about?” — EXACTLY. I’m still trying to figure it out.
Super people though… Awesome!
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As usual I am late to the party because it took me all week to wash the veil of glitter off that I was hiding behind.
Parts of it I really enjoyed, the sessions, meh. You know how I feel about them.
*skips away in MY bubble*
Dude, I am beyond late in reading everyone’s post… too busy thinking about our very own conference!
[...] was a fool at the BlogHer 2010 conference…. I went, I curmudgeoned it’s existence while enjoying every minute of my [...]