Results tagged "holiday"

Remember yesterday….?? Yes. Yesterday — Will’s official 4th birthday? Right? Yes. Yesterday. We should have left it at that, right? YAY — Happy Birthday — here are your presents and DONE. MOVED ON. OVER. But no.

Because weeks ago Will mentioned that he wanted to have a birthday party and that he wanted to invite his entire class. Also, he wanted the few friends he has outside of the school community… as well as his aunts, and grandparents. Because this is WHAT KIDS WANT. And who would we be if we didn’t go ahead and COMPLY? Right? WHAT IF WE SAID NO? Because… in hindsight, and well within the realization that this would have made us the MEANEST PARENTS ALIVE, we should have listened to our inner meanness, done the right thing and said ABSOLUTELY NOT.

But no. This is not what happened. Instead we smiled, said OH REEEAAALLY, rushed to the nearest party store and sent out invitations. Immediately. Look at the brains on us.

Now, today is Wednesday. Which means that I still have two and a half (approximately) days to pull my house together, plan and prepare foods that are loaded with deliciousness AND somehow manage to NOT look like a deranged psychopath. And, I know. It’s a kids party. GET OVER IT. But you see… yesterday something else happened that was totally and completely self inflicted. Like the brainiac I am, I gave Will a set of BATTERY OPERATED LAWN EQUIPMENT toys for his birthday…. YES. That’s right. I willingly gave him POWER GARDEN TOOLS, which he LOVES and has not stopped using since yesterday afternoon. These aren’t just toys, my friends — these could be the real thing, and they MAKE THE BEST noises—WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE ARGHGHEHGHEGHE WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. And, while I was fully prepared to toss him outdoors with the weed whacker, blower, mower and chainsaw — he’s getting over a cold and therefore needs to play with all of them AT THE SAME TIME, inside.

So, while I’m rushing around, with a teething 7 month old that won’t let me put her down — pulling down the curtains that were water stained during the hurricane FOUR MONTHS AGO… WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE is playing in the background, and I’ve found time to sit down and type this with my toes while ordering 2 dozen balloons. Alone, each of these things would be completely within reason. Party. Power tools. TEETH. But together, the combination is resulting in treachery, and only HOURS OF DAYS to go until 12-15 kids and their (lovely, mind you) parents, as well as assorted others come over to hang out for an hour and a half. DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG THAT IS? And knowing me. ME. I’m damn near set straight to have this be an all out BLOW YOUR HAIR BACK kids party. I even bought 15 Slinkies for the gift bags. WHO DOES THAT?

The same one that bought the 4 year old his very own set of power tools, apparently.

Am I alone in noticing that this week is a complete and total wash? I mean — is ANYONE DOING ANYTHING?

Or, is it just me?

Ever since my adventure last week I haven’t been wandering too far from my couch, kitchen and The Learning Channel…. ((shudder)). The things that you can learn on the learning channel are literally life changing. For example… after a marathon of watching HOARDING: BURIED ALIVE, I immediately rethought every “TO DO” project that I have sitting on my desk. I also went on a rampage of tossing any and all wrapping paper that I could get my hands on and am considering throwing things away before I ever use them. I watched two episodes of EXTREME COUPONING and have decided that not only am I a complete idiot… but I’m also hanging off of a Cecropia Tree in the Rainforest by my giant toenails. Because that is how Sloths live– In complete ignorance of the deals right in front of their faces… as I casually toss last weekends coupon circulars into the trash…No one needs 800 jars of mustard and I don’t care about shelf-life.

One thing that I did notice about this week, aside from people doing nothing, is that there is A LOT of shopping going on. I guess that the various religious events, combined with the Easter Bunny have everyone a little giddy with spring fever… How much do you want to bet that there are virgin coupon users wandering the aisles right now — gathering their hoards of No Stick Deodorant and high sodium lunchables… Only in an effort to gain some kind of TLC fame… In hopes of becoming the next HOARDING star. AHHHhhh Cable. Who knew it would come to this?

But back to not doing anything… we’ve had a lot of people visiting and helping out these past few days (since “the incident”), so while I’m enjoying everyone’s company — I’m also not really allowed to do anything. I have wandered out a little, but my ability to sit at the computer for longer than 20 minutes is dwindling as my legs fall asleep. Other fun things that I can’t do include descending stairs, emptying the dishwasher AND reaching anything below my knees. And I know… OH WOE IS ME. Whatever. We’re almost there… But I do hope to have something more interesting to post about next week… you know, when the holiday is over and people start doing things again.

In the interim, please take a minute to watch this clip. A good friend was able to obtain surveillance of the medical team I dealt with last week in Triage…. I must warn you, some of the material may be disturbing.

Nothing says Happy Easter like a team of medical zombies. If you need me, I’ll be out replacing our wrapping paper supply.

Brooch production has been halted.

Because when I wasn’t busy trying to get my almost three year old to enter the local Montessori school, I was stressing myself out over at Mamapedia by allowing others to make me feel like a bad parent. Which I’m not… but I may as well fancy myself some sort of mental masochist because there’s no real reason for me to seek out the advice of others online when I’m already treating my Psychi Cortex like a punching bag. The portion of my brain that is associated with abstract thought and judgement. Because, yes — I sent my two year old to school even though he’s two going on three in approximately ten weeks, and he seemingly hates it. But we aren’t giving up. But we are. But we’re not. But we’ll see. But he’s too young. But he’s ready. But he says he wants to go. But he says he wants to stay home. But I want it to be okay to start drinking at 10am.

And here I am defining discouragement. Coming to terms with the fact that this might not work while turning this into something about me. I want my week back. I want summer. I hate school. I thought that running and closing a design firm, handling budgets and the lack thereof and dealing with the IRS was stressful. Not to mention the Gangsters, Madoffs and Shistas. Dudes, Montessori takes the flag pole AND the pledge of allegiance — boxes them up with a bunch of cinder blocks and other assorted grunkle, climbs to the 32nd floor and then drops the box on your head. And if one more preschool teacher gaze of “oh that kid” catches my eye, I might just lose my marbs ALL OVER circle time — but at least my brooch will be undoubtedly eye catching and oh so sweet.

AND IT WAS SO MUCH FUN?!?!
(how’s that for a segway to enlightenment?)

I blogged about the brooches.
I took in “orders”.
I continued to make brooches.
I wrapped them up.
I mailed them out.

I mailed them out to people that I barely know, some that I’ve known for most of my life and others that I have never met. And I did all of this free of charge and because I wanted to. It was probably the strangest thing that I’ve done lately, and yet beyond therapeutic during a time of random torture. And yes, manic, but totally worth it and I’ll do it again in a heart beat. So while the production has been put on hold for more important matters — like deciding the probable future of another human being. I can’t wait to keep going, so if you missed out or felt a little shy last time — SNAP OUT OF IT. I want to make you a brooch…. Just look at the results!

Absence!

Vapid!

Buggin!

Punker!

Duf!

Wicked!

We spent yesterday thinking about last year.
All day.
Just thinking.
All day.
All of us.
See – Here’s Bluedog LOST IN THOUGHT.
If only he wasn’t so introverted.

It’s that time of the year.
Enough Said.

The holidays are here.

I know – next week is the official kick-off, but we want to get things going early. It’s time to stop wishing ill, whining about … everything and everyone. Heads up– this season will be over before we know it. Is it too early for a tree (a good friend asked)? I think not… bust it out… cut it down… no one is spending a fortune this year (at least not on socks) so just sit back and enjoy.